Career vs. Family

Women of today's American society have far more to consider compared to women of the past-thanks to the women of the past. The Women's Rights Movement of the 1960's really paved the way for women to become equals to men. The movement forever changed the course of women's lives today. The greatest change we have been given is option. We now have the option to choose how we want to live our lives. What it all boils down to is one "simple" question: do you start your career or your family first?

I cannot say which is better because, well, there is no one right answer. It all depends on you and what you want in this life. Yet, somehow the decision still isnt' that simple. Ya see, now that women have the option to become as "successful" as men they are choosing to do so. Women do the same things men do and even make as much money in some instances. Now the tables have turned. Where it was once looked down upon to have a career, it is now looked up to. Women who start families young are seen as weak  or as having less-than-satisfying lives.The power of career is glorified and pushed.

Coming from a Christian perspective, I believe that we have the option to choose or be led. When we choose (on purpose or accident) our own path we may have regrets and become bitter. But when we let God lead the way we can rest assured that God makes no mistakes.

I know plenty of women who started a family young (many times because out of wedlock) and are now avid supporters of starting a career first. They secretly regret the path they chose and become bitter with their current situations. And vice versa, I know many women who chose the career path first and now are deeply saddened because they are past child-bearing age and without even a potential mate. I also know people who just let God lead the way and they seem perfectly content with how their life has unfolded.

Although there are many different opinions- and rightfully so- the best option is to follow your heart and the leading of the Holy Spirit. And even if you make some mistakes along the way, it is never too late for God to turn them into stepping stones only to enhance your future.

As for me, I determined myself to break the mode that my mom and grandma had set of getting pregnant at 18. I had always planned on getting married in my early twenties and having children a few years after so that I could focus more on my career beforehand. Now I came close to my goal, but God had different plans. I did manage to not get pregnant at 18 (Thank the Lord!) and I did get married last year right before I turned 24. What I didn't expect was to become a stepmom to two little girls. That wasn't apart of the plan at all, but now I can see that it is making me a better person. Ya see, growing up, Angelina Jolie was one of my favorites because she adopted from all over the world. So I purposed in my heart to adopt like 6 kids from all over the world. The one thing I kept repeating was that I wanted the kids that I adopted to be orphans or have no idea who their parents were (possibly deceased). Not because I was mean, but because I thought I couldn't bear the children I would raise to call someone else mom. Now doesn't God have a sense of humor?? Here I am taking primary care of two little girls who call another woman 'mommy', up until now it has really bothered me. But little by little I understand that God gave me the total opposite of what I had wanted..and why? To teach me selflessness and true love- something that doesn't necessarily come from a career.

I am not knocking career first, because I am a career minded woman all the way. And I am glad that God has given me the opportunity to have a family and develop my career all at once. So there is definitely a third option!

My advice to you is not to make your decision on what your parent wants or anyone else suggests (yes take into account their wisdom), but follow God! He knows best. And just because you may start with one or the other that doesn't mean that both can't dwell together! The sky is the limit women!

I consider my family life as giving me great insight and experience for my profession. I may have a calling with my career, but I have PURPOSE through my girls;-)

God bless!

Comments welcome!