Ah, friends. Remember when it was super easy to make a new friend? You know, back in elementary when you could approach a kid with one simple question like "Do you like the Spice Girls?" and bam- friends!
For most people, making friends was simple back in school. But as most of us finished up our school years and approached adulthood, making friends became a little more complicated. Now that I am quickly coming upon the big 3-0 making friends has become a goal of mine and it's become quite the challenge.
So why is it so hard to make new friends while adulting?
1. Everyone else is busy adulting.
If you think you're the only one with a crazy busy schedule, think again. People in general are more busy today than ever before. And you'd think with all the awesome technology we have to help us balance life, we'd find time to socialize. But that's just not true. Most adults are working at least 40 hours a week. Throw in a couple kids and spouse and that makes for almost no time at all.
2. People stick to clicks.
I hate to say it but most people have their own circle of friends and no desire to enlarge it. You think there were clicks in high school, try adult clicks- it's worse. Trying to fit into a pre-made circle is like trying to shove your fist in your mouth- doesn't work for most people. And to be honest, you're probably better off outside the circle.
3. Fear of Rejection.
Let's face it. Sometimes we are just down right insecure. We see people that we think would be awesome to have as friends but they somehow intimidate us. Fear is a big hindrance for many people. It keeps them from experiencing a life filled with fun and excitement. Making friends is a part of our human nature. We were never meant to be alone. Yet sadly there are so many people whose fear of rejection keeps them lonely and depressed. The good news is that fear can be overcome with confidence. Learn to love yourself and let go and you'll be making friends in no time!
4. People are snobs.
Yes I said it. And I can say it because I come across people like this all the time. You know the ones. They look down on you because maybe you aren't up to par with their standards. You just don't fit the bill. They smile when the cameras are rolling but when you try to actually hang out they are nowhere to be found. My favorite is when they pretend they haven't gotten any of your calls or texts. It doesn't get much snobbier than that. And the truth is, they don't deserve you as a friend- you're too good for them.
5. No one knows how to make friends anymore.
It's sad, but true. We are so involved in keeping up our social media accounts that we've forgotten what is most important. At the end of the day it's not about how many twitter followers we have, it's about who we can call in the middle of the night just to say hey or to have a shoulder to lean on. That's what's important. Friendship is a powerful union and should people go back to the basics of making friends this world just might be a perfect place to live.
So today, go out of your way to make a new friend or even bring an old friendship back to life. We are all busy, but just maybe that cup of coffee with a stranger or old friend could change your life from that instant.
For some people, making friends is an art. To me, it is a necessity.
No comments:
Post a Comment